We tend to think of the human mind as the seeker of truth, but in reality, it is more of a seeker of peace.
And peace, in most cases, is not achieved through truth itself, but through a softened version of it.
If you tell someone a bitter truth, their expression would probably show it.
But if you tell the same person a hopeful lie, their eyes would sparkle.
There is a paradox in human nature that not many people are aware of:
Truth is the ultimate freedom, however, it comes after an initial period of disturbance.
On the other hand, lies limit our freedom, but they first give us comfort.
Unconsciously, many people make this choice: Short term comfort is more attractive than long-term confrontation.
Because truth requires taking responsibility.
A lie, on the other hand, only offers excuses.
While truth calls us to change, a lie helps us to stay comfortable in our comfort zone.
The human mind, most of the time, prefers the comfort of the cushion.
. . . . . . .
What makes people so drawn to those lies that make them feel good?
It’s because the mind has defense mechanisms. When talking about psychology, it is cognitive consistency. Cognitive consistency refers to a person’s desire to maintain a positive self image. When reality challenges that image, the person’s mind begins to distort reality,.
Some examples:
A person who fails says, ‘I was unlucky.’
A person who doesn’t do much says, ‘The system isn’t fair anyway.’
A person who hasn’t prepared says, ‘The questions were too hard.’
What most of these people do is not intentional lying.
They are just their minds’ natural, protective, reflexive responses.
Because in fact, the truth is: You could have done more.
Well, this statement is a real blow to the self.
And the self, to prevent itself from breaking, fabricates…
And very often those fabricated stories replace the reality.
. . . . . . . .
On a philosophical level, the issue is more profound.
Socrates said, ‘The unexamined life is not worth living.’
Still, a lot of people are simply not capable of the inner shaking the self examination causes.
After all, questioning is: Finding your own faults.
Realizing your own escapes.
Taking down the fairy tales you have been telling yourself.
And not everybody is willing to have his personal myth demolished.
Truth is not the thing that most people go after…
It’s confirmation of their narrative that they want most of all…
This explains why certain books are able to sell millions of copies.
Some speakers fill arenas.
Some quotes become viral.
Because they don’t reveal the truth; they just say what the people want to hear.
And what we usually want to hear is… You are already enough.
It’s not your fault.
Everything is because of external factors.
Such words have a very nice ring to them.
However, they are not the ones who facilitate development.
. . . . . . .
Truth nurtures, but at the same time it stings.
A lie diminishes, but it gives you a sense of inner peace.
How about a coach?
Would the one who always tells you ‘You’re perfect, amazing’ really help you get better?
Or the one who says ‘You have potential, but you must work’?
One person overly pampers your ego.
The other helps you build your character.
Generally speaking, people pick the first one.
In contrast, the successful ones, listen to the second.
Because it is the truth that leads to success.
The lie brings you comfort.
Comfort is something that you need only temporarily.
However, success is something that you can always enjoy.
Firstly, the attractiveness of deception has increased significantly in today’s era.
The largest platform for this spectacle is undoubtedly social media.
Photoshopped lives…
Only the happiest hours showcased…
Always beautiful faces…
Only the chaos is left out from people’s sharing.
People do not reveal the times they broke down emotionally.
They rarely admit that they felt incapable at times.
What gives is a continuously positive atmosphere.
And each one believes the other’s pretense.
Subsequently, they become estranged from their own selves.
If an individual constantly compares his/her life with others through their unreal shows, he/she ends up losing his/her real identity.
And that is the very beginning of the most harmful deception:
The deception turned inward.
That is just my personality.
I really don’t have the power to change.
It’s just how I am.
They don’t mean fate, though.
Most of the times they are disguised fears.
. . . . . . .
Why do lies that make us feel good seem so powerful?
It is simply because they cause dopamine to be released.
Neurologically speaking, even lies can lead to a
feeling of being rewarded.
When the mind unwinds, it releases a short-term relief.
But the real… First, truth inflicts pain.
Coming to terms with one’s shortcomings is
an emotionally challenging process.
When a person makes a mistake and is able to admit it and realizes they are wrong, such things are damaging to one’s ego.
However, at the same time, they are great for helping one develop awareness.
This is the point where a conscious person disagrees with a comfort-seeker.
The former would ask, ‘What is the truth?’
Whereas the latter is only concerned with ‘What feels right?’
. . . . . .
It is a fact that good feeling lies are a growth postponing tool.
Truths that have a painful effect, are the beginning of a change.
Those who decide to live a forwar moving life.
Select ego’s partner that is truth not.
They don’t tell what they decide to hear, they speak the voice of what they have to hear.
Because they understand: One time truth hurts, the next time it strengthens. Lies comfort one time, the next time they limit.
. . . . . .
To make a self-enquiry such as: ‘Is it really truth that I desire… Or comfort?’
Is a sign of being brave.
And the response to that question is the one that will determine your life’s trajectory.
Being a truth living person one is a slow grower but a steady grower.
The one who is a liar is a quick releaser but a stagnant one.
And time is a great revealer.
Truth confronters grow their strength.
Lies feeders grow their fragility.
Maybe it’s this:
People don’t hate the truth…
They just are not ready for it.
Because the truth requires changes.
And changes disturb comfort.
However, you should also keep in mind that:
Comfort is not a source of growth.
It only generates habits.
And habits can turn into invisible prisons.
. . . . . .
And now take a moment and be truthful to yourself:
Which lies in your life make you feel good?
And which truths would lead to your personal development?
Because each human being has two inner voices: One of them is for peace.
The other one is for truth. Peace may be fleeting.
While truth lasts forever. A person changes the most
At the moment when they become aware of the fantasies they have been living by.
. . . . . .
Just one last statement, a slap of clarity: Truth does not harm you.
Truth creates you.
Those who are scared of discomfort are incapable of growing.
Those who desire growth move forward in truth.
And the mightiest ones
Are those who confront reality the most.
And now it’s your turn:
The lie that soothes?
Or the truth that changes?